What is Therapy ?
Text books describe therapy as
‘safe relational communication which enables the expression of any human experience which affects a person’s wellbeing.’
Research shows the most important element is the quality of the relationship between the therapist and client. In attachment focussed therapy the relationship between therapist and client is where beliefs about the ‘self’ which developed with caregivers can be understood , and in the safety of the therapeutic relationship explored to enable healing and change. Your journey is your own and the depth of the emotional experience completely individual.
Who we relate to and feel comfortable with is the single biggest contributor to the therapy experience and effectiveness. To decide who you want to work with talk to or visit Therapists .
For more on how I work , take a look at 'Get To Know Me'. I offer an introductory session at a reduced fee of £30.
How does Therapy work ?
Therapy is a healing process which has at the heart of it, the desire for change at some level ; of situation, of thoughts, feelings or behaviour patterns .Effective counselling or psychotherapy can help contain, address and explore feelings or situations to ;
- 'Psycho-educate' to manage anxiety, depression ,over thinking or behaviours affecting our well being
Develop awareness about ourselves and our beliefs to grow our sense of self and self esteem
Reflect on and deepen relationships
Help to identify and manage triggers
Restore a sense of purpose , well being or equilibrium
Over time our brain logs experiences in different ways depending on which part is activated. The effects of some experiences can be ‘filed ‘ away very deeply, particularly when these experiences are traumatic and/ or happen when we are very young. We respond unconsciously to situations, sometimes in ways which although helpful then, aren’t now. Sometimes it develops ways of thinking and responding which 'worked' in the past but may be hindering now.
Therapy will focus on areas causing issue now and aims to unlock awareness of what’s been embedded in your unconcuous – providing insight into repeated patterns , triggering thoughts, exploring feelings and defences that might stop us changing and discovering different ways of being that are more helpful, fulfilling and rewarding now.
It works because we both commit to a process .
I bring myself ,my clinical knowledge and understanding and you bring yourself ,your courage and commitment to change.
My hope is that it will be a liberating experience and over time a deep confidence in your own being ,choices and abilities begins to emerge as we work to support or treat any symptoms you are experiencing.
"We can heal what we feel"
What Can I Expect ?
Confidential, Professional support
Therapy is a healing change process rather than a magic pill or a quick fix: It involves commitment and courage within a managed, explorative and creative process. Over time even small changes and reflections on deep issues can bring life-changing results.
From me you can expect a warm, professional welcome and a non- judgemental approach which focusses on you and what you want to work on.
Taking the first step is often the hardest thing to do – but if now feels like the right time then I encourge you to explore and hope you experience something releasing and rewarding.
Our work will invite an exploration into our deeper human experience and gently encourage change from within, at a pace which is personally and clinically relevant to you and your experiences.
'Start changing yourself if you want to change the life around you'
A few tips for getting the most from your therapy
What do I want? How do I Feel?
Often its hard to know the answers to these questions at first . Try arriving 10 minutes early just to put a break between your day and this time to collect your thoughts and feelings before the session.
Expect to work with me. Therapy is a collaborative process. We will both be allied to your goal and working towards it .
Your brain and body will be very active during a session and it can feel like we’ve covered a lot of ground .Try reflecting on sessions and jotting down things you notice during the week. Its not an instruction and may not suit everyone – but some find it useful . It activates the front left brain and helps us be an 'observer of our experience' as opposed to being in them. It may even help to bring it to session with you.
Try New Things
Therapy is a safe place to explore yourself , your responses and thoughts and feelings and also to try things out . Maybe you tend to think more than feel or are more passive than assertive, maybe you fear confrontation or want to practice asking for something. Whatever is true for you - go ahead and see how it feels.
Some people ask for change but feel uncomfortable when it happens. If you're seeking change, be open to all there is to discover. Where we focus our intention is where we want to see results and my hope is that you will begin to experience these for yourself.
Useful Websites /Apps
There are lots of useful resources on the web if you like to read . Try https://www.headspace.com for meditation and sleep, for information on a wide range of issues try https://www.mind.org.uk/ or Verywell Mind - Know More. Live Brighter.